December 6, 2007
You know your husband loves you when:
You go to the coffee shop to buy a 6 pump Vanilla Latte and when you go to pay for it, after already having sipped the first few scrumptious sips of sweetness off the top, you realize you have no debit card, no check book and no cash. Absolutely no money to pay for anything. None. NAKED of money, that’s you.
You call your husband and the conversation probably goes like this:
Hello?
BABE?
….. uh, Ya?
I just went to the coffee shop and got a drink and went to pay for it only to realize that I had NO debit card, NO checks and NO CASH.
HaahaahaaaHAAA…… oh, that’s funny.
……… NO. It’s not. You TOOK ALL my money!
(realizing now that the call is not a call of humor story exchanges) Well, it wasn’t on purpose.
Well! I am really annoyed!
Well, honey, it was just funny timing.
………………………. (silence)
I’m not crazy husband guy, I didn’t TAKE all your money on purpose so you couldn’t spend money.
Well, I KNOW THAT. But. I want you to care more! I want this to be your problem too! I want you to be ANGRY! AS ANGRY AS ME!
Okay, I’ll see you in a little bit. Love you.
AND THE CAR CLOCK IS STILL AN HOUR FAST! YOU STILL HAVEN’T CHANGED THE CAR CLOCK!
(click)
And then probably 2 hours later, the same husband gets yet another call from his sweet, angelic wife.
……… Hello?
What are you doing?
Watching TV, what are you doing?
What?! You’re watching TV?! You didn’t mess up my shows did you?!
Um, ya, I think I did.
WHAT?!
Sternfalter (code word for totally, completely, no b*llsh*t telling the truth)
I can’t believe this!
Well, it wouldn’t let me change the channel without canceling one of your recordings.
So, you just CANCELED THEM?! MY SHOWS?! MY PRECIOUS SHOWS?!?!?!
Okay, I’ll see you when you get home in a bit, okay? Love you.
WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!
(click)
(calling back)
Hello?
ARE YOU BEING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW?!
Babe, I said Sternfalter.
(huge, big frustrated air sound)
Okay, I’m going to go now, I’m tired of being in trouble for the day.
FINE!
(click)
So. Back to the beginning. You know your husband loves you when you come home after ALL this and he still pats the couch next to him and says “Wanna watch America’s Next Top Model together?”
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December 6th, 2007 at 12:48 pm, JMC Says:
How’d you come up with “sternfalter?” Also, how did you end up paying for your coffee?
December 6th, 2007 at 12:59 pm, Ms. Battle Station Says:
Good questions JMC! We stole Sternfalter from a famous youth speaker in the Mormon church, I can’t remember his name.
They gave me the drink for free. They’re nice.
Jamie
December 6th, 2007 at 1:27 pm, becca Says:
I hate when they feel like they can just cancel the shows without asking. Like whatever they want to watch is more important than the TWO shows I am recording at the same time. Would I be recording them if they weren’t crucial to watch? Um, no. It’s good that he’ll watch with you, though. DH usually gripes for a minute about not knowing what’s going on then just goes to bed. I did notice that he didn’t head to the bedroom last night until the credits were rolling on Private Practice. Uh huh. You can’t fool me.
December 6th, 2007 at 1:41 pm, Jess Says:
Aww, you guys are the sweetest. I hate that you can only record two things at once and you can’t WATCH a third thing. It almost defeats the purpose of the DVR. It only gets you ONE extra show.
December 6th, 2007 at 5:46 pm, melissa Says:
OK, sweet and all, but seriously: he deleted your shows? That’s grounds for a serious smackdown in my house.
December 7th, 2007 at 11:00 am, misty Says:
that was nice of them to give you the drink for free! made a bit of a bad day a little better.
December 7th, 2007 at 5:10 pm, sari Says:
I want you to come to my blog because you got an award - and it’s free! ha ha!
December 7th, 2007 at 5:44 pm, starfish Says:
He’d be patting that couch with his arm in a cast. Cancel my shows….that’s cause for divorce I think…
December 7th, 2007 at 6:12 pm, PoultryBoy Says:
Hello. Great post and great blog. I stumbled across your site via Sari’s site. Permission to stumble over here again?
December 10th, 2007 at 6:44 pm, Pug Mom Says:
Ha ha ha ha… that’s why you attach a little automatic Mace sprayer to your wallet. So somebody gets the point rather quickly that separate wallets are the way to go.
However, it seems that my pugs believe “Attack” to be “Do NOT stop until you have covered his nose with wet kisses.” But hey, the BF doesn’t like that, so all’s well that ends well.
As for me, I just stick my pugs on the BF whenever he exhibits any undesirable behavior.
December 12th, 2007 at 11:12 am, Melissa Says:
That was a really funny one! Thanks for the laugh once again!
December 13th, 2007 at 3:51 am, Nicki Says:
Oh my but you’re funny! Don’t even worry, I need to change my undies from reading your stories (too many babies, not enough muscles downstairs).
December 14th, 2007 at 10:14 am, Marlene Says:
You guys are so cute! And so funny!