August 14, 2008

For some INSANE reason that I have since forgotten or blocked from my memory forever, I agreed to let my brother Burke and my sister Audrey stay the night at my house the night prior to our leaving for 2 weeks to Africa together. They were at my house for our “Pre-Africa Sleepover!” but were not necessarily SLEEPING - per say. None of us were, actually. And since it was my party and I could cry if I wanted to, I totally did and I am still to this day quite proud of myself for doing so. I never, ever, never, ever cry and the prior week of pretending that PACKING IS FUN!!! and acting as if we were TOTALLY READY TO BRING ANOTHER CHILD HOME!!! had really worn me out. We all know how painfully exhausting it is for me to maintain self-composure. Ugh.

So, there we all are, cracked out on Africa adrenaline and not sleeping. So my husband, being the resourceful and thoughtful man that he is, put us all to work and assigned household cleaning duties to each of us with varying degrees of difficulty depending on our individual cracked-outness. Jobs ranged from vacuuming to changing light bulbs to dumping trash and organizing cupboards. Because LEST WE FORGET: My Mother-in-Law and Sister-in-Law were flying up to stay at our house for a week and a half to care for the child already in existence as a member of the Battle Station Clan while we all left to go retrieve the Imaginary Boy. So, if that doesn’t just make you hyperventilate thinking about your MIL and SIL chillin at your house without you there to sweep any dried poop under the fridge in the mornings before they wake up, well then you are quite strange and devoid of human emotion. Because THAT’S SOME SCARY STUFF RIGHT THERE and we, as in Mike and I, were feelin every prickly rush of fear in our bodies that night as all of us Zombie Merry Maids routinely checked for rings in the toilets at 2 am. Later, when we all dozed off at 3 am with our alarms set for 4:45, I thought to myself, that was dumb.

But, nevertheless, we were off! At 5:15 am, my Mom and Dave met up with us and we all loaded up into two stylish minivan cabs and then waited a few moments while the two cabbies YELLED, in the wee hour of the morn, at us, at each other and into their walkie-talkies back and forth from our driveway. They seemed to be confused and possibly thought they were at a KISS Concert? We kindly reminded them that all the houses around us and in our very close proximity were full of sleeping humans. And also, we happened to be standing right in front of them, the yelling was not necessarily needed in a setting such as this, thanks so much. We depart to the airport. We think the cabbies are racing each other but we could also be imagining this and every now and then, one of us has a sudden and frightening flashback of Mike the Merry Maid Director.

Boise to Chicago was about a 3 hour flight and what would have been a nice and much needed cat nap was actually one dude with an entire airplane’s worth of a captive audience. So far the trip has been a little bit manic, a little bit tiring and a lot louder than I had expected. But let us proceed towards the Imaginary Boy.

We’re in Chicago! I think we stepped out of the plane, took about 2.5 steps and already ran into skaters Burke knew. This is what happens. Burke and the skaters, they hone in on each other’s whereabouts and pick up on each other’s skatestink.

There he is talking with one of about 5 dudes he knew in the Chicago airport. He’s CLEARLY not just a LOCAL Celebrity anymore. No Ma’am.

Chicago layover is 4 hours and during that time we managed to spend about $3,867 on airport cuisine and random “necessities” like magazines and books, neck pillows and pills. We are quite obviously hardened travelers. I think we even bought a t-shirt that says “Chicago!” on it. We strive to maintain a healthy sense of consumerism.

Back on an airplane destined to Frankfurt, an 8 hour flight. We fly Lufthansa and are pleasantly surprised by the good food, free beverages, in flight movies and friendly flight attendants. So far, we love Lufthansa and ask how we can sign up for the Lufthansa Cheerleading Team.

This was after we landed and really, I have no idea why Mike is making this face. He slept the ENTIRE TIME. The Jerk. I literally remember us walking to our seats at the beginning of the Lufthansa flight, finding our row, shimmying in, putting my things under the seat in front of me and as I was buckeling my seat belt, I glanced over at Mike and he was already PASSED OUT, totally asleep. Like with pools of drool already forming around the creases of his mouth. And he stayed in this comatose state the ENTIRE 8 hours of flying time. So. Do NOT think he is justified in making this face WHATSOEVER.

I hate people who can sleep on airplanes. I hate what you have. I hate that I don’t have it.

So here we all are in Frankfurt.

I am very much enjoying having the camera. I love my new job title as “Documenter of the Experience”. These things coupled with the fact that I am EX.HAUSTED beyond belief make me the crowd favorite. Especially when I keep taking shots like this.

Someone takes the camera. We end up with this shot instead:

You tell me which “Documenter of the Experience” YOU would rather travel with.

I know, right? People don’t understand my ART.

So, Frankfurt Layover. Let me refer to my notes. 2 hour layover. Burke’s skateboard is confiscated, Burke throws a fit nothing short of amazing, a temper tantrum so grotesque, He MIGHT have even thrown himself on the floor and rolled around crying and kicking his feet. I don’t know. I was as physically FAR AWAY as I could be, hiding behind a payphone with a suitcase over my head, doing everything in my power not to drop-kick his spleen into downtown Frankfurt.

Let’s see. More Frankfurt notes. Ah yes. The first signs of pink eye show up in Frankfurt. The first signs show up on Audrey, on her left eye, to be exact. We were having an Espresso together and she asked me if something was in her eye. I looked over at her and I’m not gonna lie, it looked like DEATH had taken a shat RIGHT IN her eye. In and around her eye. I grimaced and looked away, hoping I hadn’t stared into the eye of death itself and would be cursed with the same condition. The stinkeye jokes ensue. This would be a constant source of comedy throughout the entire trip, little did we know.

Frankfurt to Addis, we all sleep the full 8 hours. Blissful, interrupted repeatedly, sleep for 8 hours. We arrive in Addis at 7 pm their time. We all get off the plane and take a long hard look at each other and learn that I HAD fallen victim to the stinkeye and Mike had popped a blood vessel in his left eye. We looked haggard, like we had all been sucker-punched in the jaw.

There’s the Addis Airport - yay! We made it!

And there’s our Tour Guide and Driver! Yay! Shameless plug here for Jacaranda Tour Company. They were AMAZING. Always on time, always professional, always took care of us, always did everything right. LOVE LOVE LOVE THEM! Especially after our fiasco with Susan Parr Travel, we really came to appreciate Jacaranda, they never let us down. Love them. Did I mention we loved them?

All 14 of our suitcases made it, amazingly. We headed out to the Ghion Hotel for our very first night in Ethiopia.

In the lobby of the Ghion, waiting to get our rooms. Notice our personal space bubbles are getting larger by the moment.

Lobby of the Ghion, other direction. I’ll be honest, I really don’t remember much from this night. I think we eventually unloaded our suitcases in our rooms and went to sleep. I do remember eating a late dinner in the Ghion Restaurant and I do remember a cat meowing from the kitchen as they were preparing our food. Which is not a lie.

Our bathroom.

Our 1950’s marital twin beds.

Me with my last happy face of the day. The last one I had.

And that’s a wrap. Day one was actually about a 36 hour day when it was all said and done. Successful in that we made it to Ethiopia and we did not murder Burke and stuff his body in an airport trash can. Unsuccessful in that it seemed we were running the stinkeye rampant throughout our travel party. But what’s a little poop in the eye, you know? That’s what I always say.

Look out for Day 3 coming soon! (Day 2 was in combination with Day 1)

August 8, 2008

We FINALLY made it back, clawing our way through the door frame of our home by our fingernails 4 days ago. But we made it. No thanks to Susan Parr Travel. We’ll get into that in a bit.

But the funniest, strangest thing happened. Siyum? That boy? He is an ACTUAL BOY. Actually actual. Actually.

I know, right? Who expected THAT?!

When we pulled into the care center and stepped out of the van I thought to myself “That little boy running at us looks an awfully lot like those photos we have of an imaginary child named Siyum. How bizarre!” And before I knew it, the little imaginary boy was in my arms and hugging my neck. I could feel that he was there in my arms but just to make sure, I looked over at Mike and was about to ask,”Hey the face on my shoulder…is it really HIS face on my shoulder?” but judging from the tears in Mike’s eyes, I started putting two and two together and realized all at once that this was the imaginary boy that had actually been a REAL boy that whole time and this was us meeting him. Quick I am.

Photo of Mike first holding him:

And Siyum, later, in pink pajamas:

I think what I’m going to do is do a post for every day we were there with a couple pictures from each day. And I’m excited to do that because I want to remember each day we were there, all the beautiful country we saw and all the amazing people we met. So saddle up! Two weeks of traveling with my INSANE family across Ethiopia to pick up our 2.5 year old son is all about to be documented “Battle Station Style” on the blawg.

Thanks to many of you for checking in with me. I’m apologizing in advance for a slowdown in email responses over the next few weeks. But your emails are very much appreciated and I can’t wait to share with everyone our experience.

Stay tuned.

Jamie. The one with two kids.