May 15, 2007
First and foremost, Congratulations are in order for the Disgustingest Couple of the Year. Disgusting Couple is having a BABY!!
All of us here at the Battle Station would like to congratulate Disgusting Couple. May your disgustingly attractive union produce a disgustingly beautiful and healthy child. Here’s hoping that you guys can stop being so disgustingly in love at all of our social occasions. With your new disgustingly beautiful baby in the mix, the disgustingness permeating from your general direction might just double the need for anti-bacterial soap throughout the world, to help rid us of the disgustingness that YOU TWO created.
Congratulations to James and Abby. Even though you guys becoming parents runs us all the risk of being around EVEN MORE disgusting love displays between the two of you, I think we are all willing to take that risk. You guys are going to be amazing parents.
And yet, another congratulations are in order! Congratulations to Lisa!
Lisa is the proud owner of two new lovely mammaries. Hello ladies! And welcome to this big beautiful world. I know Lisa is happy to have you here, and so is her husband Phil on that note. I know both of you are getting a lot of attention right now, but remember, she is MY friend. Don’t think you two can just implant yourselves here and take over. You can never love her like her friends love her.
Be careful Lisa, those two are up to something.
And I would like to publicly express my thoughts on boob jobs. I used to be against them. I personally don’t desire one. But what I AM for, is a woman’s perogative. A woman’s choice, to make her own decisions without other women attacking her, that’s what I’m for. So, whether you are pro-b**b job or not, know that womens’ rights INCLUDE a woman’s right to get new bre*stesis. So, Go Lisa! I know this was something you had saved for and wanted for a long time. Try not to let your kid dangle from these ones as much, it may or may not help with the longevity. just a passing thought.
And last but not least, as promised, a picture of my insanely beautiful Mom:
I recieved a couple emails wanting to know if the Mother’s Day brunch turned out okay and if anyone ended up bleeding out from the eyes or general head area. The answer is that yes, the brunch turned out fabulous (happy now Audrey?). Audrey surprised us all by showing up coherent AND with all the correct ingredients to the fruit salad. And Burke, he brought pillsbury cinnamon rolls and he EVEN applied the frosting by HIMSELF (this is HUGE for a 16 year old).
For a couple minutes while we were all eating at my breakfast table, I looked around and thought, what a nice family get together on Mother’s Day. Jeez. I just love you guys. I have the best sister and brother and Mom that a girl could ask for.
And then Burke ran upstairs and threw up in our toilet. And my Mom had to go administer Burke Revival.
We were all sitting there when we heard this strange moan coming from upstairs, a moan resembling a slowly dying cow going through a really horrible death, calling “MoooooooooooooMMM” “I just threw uuuuuuuuuupppppp” “Please come heeeeeeeeeerrreeeee”…
Happy Mother’s Day Mom. She literally hadn’t even finished half her Quiche.
Posted by Jamie @ 8:58 pm • my crazy family, my friends are better than yours
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May 15th, 2007 at 11:27 pm, jenn Says:
what a hoot! your writing is a pleasure to read. thanks for the comment. looking forward to following along.
May 16th, 2007 at 9:03 am, Emily Says:
Thanks for the update and yes your mother is beautiful!
May 16th, 2007 at 10:40 am, Jennifer Says:
Seriously, you bring a smile to my face every time I read your blog! Congratulations on your friends’ pregnancy and boob job. And congratulations on the great genes that your mom has- she is beautiful.
May 16th, 2007 at 12:13 pm, mama2roo Says:
Ha! I’ve got a friend who just brought home “2 new girlfriends” a few weeks ago, too.
I think your family and the “disgusting” family above are ALL pretty much disgustingly beautiful…me and my mom…we don’t look like that! Maybe Burke had enough of the beauty and that’s why he had to go yak up breakfast.
Em
May 17th, 2007 at 9:35 pm, Theresa Says:
OooooOOOOoooOOOO new digs! See how behind I am! Now I have to update my links. And run away because there are too many beautiful people on this page. LOVE the new site!!
May 17th, 2007 at 11:16 pm, Jennifer Says:
Do you live in STEPFORD, Idaho? Seriously everyone you know and/or have a familial relationship with is out of an Abercrombie and Fitch ad! At least I can be reassured by the fact that people vomit in your world.
May 18th, 2007 at 11:04 am, dana Says:
Hi. I’ve never visited your blog before, but now that I found it, I love it! Karen did your design so well! She’s got the talent!!
May 18th, 2007 at 5:11 pm, Audrey Says:
Oh Jamie… You are so silly. Im the middle child remember? Im never happy.
*Audrey*
May 19th, 2007 at 7:13 pm, Auntie Irene Says:
All your Blogs are great. This one was especially funny. Glad to be a part of the family–even if we all are either insanely beautiful or just plain crazy.
You’re a doll, sweetie.
May 21st, 2007 at 6:42 pm, JustEnjoyHim/Judy Says:
Nice new digs!
1. Your 16-year-old brother can’t throw up by himself yet??
2. Your mother IS insanely beautiful AND she looks more like she’s your sister than your mother!
3. I honestly thought I was misreading it when you said that Lisa was the owner of new mammaries. HAHA!!!
June 25th, 2007 at 1:33 am, Fully Operational Battle Station » Mama's got a brand new bag Says:
[...] insanely beautiful Mom, in order to understand why men drive 7 hours to go on a date with her, go here. Posted by Jamie @ 1:33 am • my crazy family [...]
January 18th, 2008 at 6:34 pm, Fully Operational Battle Station » You've got to have friends Says:
[...] Disgusting couple had their baby. A beautiful, perfect baby boy. I couldn’t be more happy for [...]