March 31, 2007

Well, it’s official. I can legitimately be knighted a legit blogger, I feel, because I just received my first ever negative comment from the ever so cordial “anonymous” (I believe anonymous has visited some of your sites as well? Quite thorough that anonymous). The detestful comment was in response to this post.

I am annoyed at myself because I immediately deleted both my email and the blog comment with anonymous’ message, it was a knee-jerk reaction to hide the evidence and I should have kept it as a trophy welcoming me to the Indisputable Blogger Club. I believe dooce keeps all of her hate mail in a special file entitled “all you need is hate” because 1. it is fun to share on the blog and 2. it is fun to share on the blog.

I will try and paraphrase what anonymous said:

“Please don’t call her your Birthmom. She is a birth mother and she is an expectant mother. And if she chooses to continue with the adoption, she will be his mother, not yours.”

First off, do I really need to clarify here that I do not consider her my mom? I feel as though the people who visit my humble little site here are for the most part (with the exception of a few unruly relatives) educated and logical people and I, therefore, don’t usually feel the need to state the obvious. But here it goes:

I do not consider our Birthmom our Birthmom. I consider her Miles’ Birthmom. I use the phrase “our Birthmom” because she is the Birthmom that we are working with, not because I am verbally or emotionally taking possession of her and her uterus. Also I don’t feel like typing out “our potential son Miles’ expectant mother” because I am lazy like that and it makes for non-flowing reading.

But I think most of ya’ll get that right?

Secondly, I think with adoption, you can’t please everyone. Someone is always going to be offended, even when your intentions are clearly those of respect and admiration for a woman who will always be a part of our lives. So, someone decided to be offended because I said Birthmom instead of Expectant Mother. What can you do? I guarantee someone else would be offended if I started using that term instead. I don’t find the term Birthmom offensive. I don’t find the term adoptive mom offensive either. Sorry. I don’t.

So, anonymous, thanks for inadvertently inducting me into the bonafide bloggy hall of fame. I am proud to receive this honor and I couldn’t have done it without you. I would like to thank all my respective bloggy friends for their guidance and support, my loyal battle station fans who got me this far, my husband for being my foundation, my cute kid and my family, and most importantly God. Thank you!

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7 Responses to “I’m Bonafide!”

1. April 1st, 2007 at 4:15 am, luckyzmom Says:

   It is anonymous’ problem. You seem like and exceptionally generous loving person.

2. April 1st, 2007 at 2:30 pm, Ami Says:

   Oh my word, Anonymous needs to get over himself or herself. You go, Jamie!

3. April 1st, 2007 at 3:45 pm, Fiddledeedee (It Coulda' Been Worse) Says:

   I have a little button that I push so that no one can leave an anonymous comment. I really like that feature of my blog. I understand your frustration. I’ve had only two negative comments, and I really had to stop and think about what a sad place they must be in to feel the need to spew forth nastiness. For them I used the “delete” button.

   I’ve read “Dooce” and seen her take on negative comments. Made me laugh out loud.

   BTW, I love the name of your blog!!!

4. April 1st, 2007 at 8:28 pm, BorninPA Says:

   Very cute. Congratulations.

5. April 2nd, 2007 at 11:49 pm, Richard J Says:

   Wait! You mean that isn’t your actual mother your calling your birthmom? I thought you were adopting your own half-sister. Boy, was I ever wrong.

   I’ve run into that Anonymous character before. He’s got a really bad attitude. You guys are doing great (even if you did paint the kitchen). Keep going!

   Richard
   http://familyfrontiers.blogspot.com/

6. April 3rd, 2007 at 3:44 pm, Stephanie V Says:

   Welcome to blogging where annonymous dorks feel it’s fully appropriate to saunter over to your front door and poo right there on your mat! We are not allowed to have our own thoughts, as we must be the same person with the same ideas at the same time. Don’t try to escape, no one will hear your screams.

   Congratulations! It’s fun isn’t it?

7. April 4th, 2007 at 1:01 am, Anonymous Says:

   Pssst! It’s me Beth.
   I just wanted to send you a nice anonymous comment.

   You’re nice.