February 27, 2007
Every now and then you catch a small glimpse of what your future holds for you. You can, for the tiniest moment, see what is in store for you and yours, what that life will be like. An example of this may be once you met the person you were going to marry and you saw your future with this person, a life filled with laughter and love and tivo, it was amazing.
Well, we were slapped in the face with our glimpse the other day when Delaney literally had a MELTDOWN over her outfit. Please let me remind all of my pretend readers at this time that Delaney is not even a real person yet. She is barely three, she is like a half-person, she doesn’t even know how to hop on one foot or how to put her shoes on the right feet, we figure she is about the equivilent of a dolphin when it comes to IQ (you know, a really smart dolphin that can count to 10 in spanish).
But yet, there she was, SOBBING over the fact that her jeans weren’t cute. Really really crying over this. Let me just interject here because I know ya’ll are thinkin that she must learn this from watching me and although I take credit for her saying bad words and dancing like Beyonce in the nude, I have never lost my mind over my outfit like that. I just don’t care that much about my clothes and will usually wear a t-shirt and jeans. So anyway, Delaney somehow has this innate desire to have the perfect outfit and it finally manifested itself the other day.
Mike and I couldn’t help but laugh. And we all know that when we are losing our minds, being laughed at takes the histeria to a whole new level of delirium which we called “shock and awe”. Mike and I were all “Isn’t this happening about 8 years too soon?”
We were left feeling profoundly sad over the fact that she will care about boys and want to talk on the phone and play with barbies. We really wanted her to be a tomboy until she was in college, either that or a lesbian to spare her the inevitable despair and suffering that are ugly, sweaty, mean little boys.
I always envisioned Delaney growing up like my sister Audrey, with worms and mud pies and ratty hair and a vengeance to destroy. This made me smile, thinking of my little punk sister. While I was afraid of bugs and slides at the park, Audrey was eating the bugs and doing cartwheels down the slides. I dug up some pictures as proof:
Audrey preparing to shoot neighborhood puppies:
Audrey having a morning-time stare down with my mom:
and Audrey getting geared up in Camo:
In case you were wondering, she did not end up joining the Army like we all thought, she ended up looking like this:
I know. Discustingly beautiful. Teenage pregnancy ensued partly in blame of it, which by the way produced this:
Her name is Mialee, who by the way enjoys burping, playing in irrigation ditches with her Uncle Mike, farting and competing in ultimate championship cage fights. …… lucky.
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February 28th, 2007 at 8:00 pm, dcrmom Says:
You’re hilarious. Welcome to life with little girls. 3 going on 13. Sounds about right!
February 28th, 2007 at 10:43 pm, JJ Says:
Hey dcrmom!
I finally was able to view your website. I’m not very smart and kept ending up at the 100 things instead of the real site. I love it! Thanks for stopping by again!
Jamie
March 1st, 2007 at 10:47 am, Jen Says:
Loving your site…I think we should start a travelling show. I’ll stand on my soapbox and you can warm up the audience with laughter. I look forward to checking back in to see how your journey is going. I’m going to go look now and see where you are in the process. BTW, IRC is a great org!!
March 1st, 2007 at 11:57 am, JJ Says:
Hi Jen!
Thanks for the compliment and thanks for stopping by. I think there already is a travelling show for us that we can join called the circus. I’ll meet you there!
I’ll be following your journey as well. I’m so excited to see you get your girls.
Jamie